When would I be able to break out from the circle?

I felt bad again, for criticizing or scolding others.
I shouldn't have said 'that's why they're still there'.
I'm sorry.
They could have a reason for doing that job, may be they like it there or may be it wasn't in their scope to attend to me in the first place and I've misinterpreted their intentions.
May be they were doing their best in being helpful? May be...
Anyway, it still wasn't right for me to make such judgement rashly and it isn't like me either.
I've said things that I wished I could take back. It wasn't all insults, some are just plain weird.
I know I can't take it back so I hope the person that listened to it would forget about it.

Is it normal to feel this way? For feeling bad on simple acts like this?
Why am I still in this same circle? Can I or should I break out from it?

Well, I really do want to break out from it but may be it's a gift? Or I'm just too self-conscious. ahaha